I think of you, my sister, my two brothers, often. I think of then and now. I think of what could be and what could have been had things turned out differently for us. I think of the final crack in the foundation that held us together and the barrier that remains, so strong that things between us will never be cohesive again. There is rarely a day that goes by that I do not regret all of the things that keep us apart. Regardless, I have things to say to you all.
To my sister, Linda
I admire you for so many reasons and always have. You came to my aid countless times. Your wisdom, humor and strength pulled me out of the muck more times than I care to count. I remember them all, from when I was a girl confused about what was happening to my body on that day. You know the day. The day I could not go to mom because that talk we were suppose to have, never happened. You were my hero that day. Helping me understand what I needed to do to take care of myself. Helping me not feel so ashamed and confused.
You came running one night when I was paralyzed with depression, unable to move from the chair I was in. Unable to find the will to go on. Broken down and hopeless. You showed up and talked me through that horrible night. You gave me reasons to hang on and reminded me who I was.
You were here, watching over me after my hysterectomy went wrong. As the abscess was unknowingly growing and reeking havoc in my body until there was no recourse but to call the professionals in. I know I scared you to death because of the pain I was in, yet you stayed to comfort me with everything you had. You were there when nobody else was.
I know I called you for help many more times than you did for me. I know how unbalanced things were between us. In between, we managed to squeeze in some great times together. The years are etched in my book of life, as good ones.
You showed up on my birthday one year, in the August heat and made a sanctuary for me in the forsythia. I came home to the surprise of a lifetime. You were hot, sweaty and dirty from all of the work you did to create that special little spot. You lifted and carried heavy pieces of granite for stepping-stones into the secret garden. You outdid yourself with creativity and hard work to make something so special just for me.
I admire your conviction to your beliefs. I admire the huge, blind leap you took to leave your life in the United States and move to El Salvador to fulfill your calling in life. I admire what you have achieved in two years and that your path in life has moved beyond any boundaries that you were previously held back by. You have shown me that a dream can come true if you have faith enough to let go and jump.
To you my sister, these are things I need to say to you today. There will be another time to say things to our brothers, today is for you and only you. My sister, my best friend, my family.
From my sister to me: