Spring Things….Goodbye Bunny

Posted: April 28, 2010 in Uncategorized

As I’ve written, there’s just something about Spring. Try as I may to enjoy it, the unsettled feelings stick like glue. A good day, a couple bad ones. Frustrating to say the least. There is a story from my childhood that may shed some light on why I struggle so through this season of beauty and renewal. It’s a story about leaving Easter behind in a very nice hotel room.

Goodbye Bunny

For the first 7 years of my life I lived in a little town called Depew. Depew was a 1950’s bedroom town, our big city was Buffalo. In my 7th year my salesman dad had wonderful opportunity in the form of a promotion which he took. The new job was in California. So like the Beverly Hillbillies we packed up and moved….not to Beverly, but to San Jose.

Depew was a place of a very large, very Italian extended family. My maternal grandpa for Sunday dinner, delicious meal and always a few games of cards with just me afterwords. Visiting uncles and cousins, family parties in our yard. My dad was the activity director and boy was he good at it. To have so much family to grow up with was amazing. Stories and laughter and wine, lots of wine. To have had that for seven years, I consider myself very fortunate.

Came the news of a new life three thousand miles away. As the youngest of four, it was strictly an adventure to me. I was much to young to understand what it really meant. How hard it must have been on my mom to leave her family, her father. I must not have been privy to the worry or details of the move. I do remember my father leaving for a couple weeks at time to get things settled for our arrival. Calling one night to announce that he had located and purchased our new home, equiped with a “cement pond”. How cool was that for seven year old me. My detachment to all things Depew began after that phone call.

My dad worked for a good company and had many perks. The family didn’t have to lift a finger. Moving vans arrived, all of our possessions were carefully boxed up and labeled accordingly by professionals. My mother’s milk glass collection carefully wrapped with much consideration. Very classy operation I must say.

There must have been a day or so after the house was packed up before we could fly to our exciting new destination. We checked in, all six of us to a very nice hotel. My dad had come back from California to oversee all of the fine details to bring his clan to their new digs. I don’t remember all that much except that it was Easter. Our final day in the hotel was Easter Sunday and my parents being who they were, made it a magical Easter. The four of us kids awoke to the same caliber of Easter goodies that we were accustomed to when we were not living in a nice hotel. Baskets of chocolate eggs and the big solid bunny with the yellow and white candy eyes. No disappointment here.

Since I was seven, and not really in the loop of all things grown up, it seemed like just another Easter Sunday to me. Except this Easter Sunday my family would be boarding a big jet, first class, no less and leaving home, leaving our wonderful loving extended family behind. My mother’s dad came to the hotel to say goodbye, I don’t recall tears though I’m sure there were many. After that it was time to leave. Our Easter baskets lined up on the hotel dresser, barely touched because of time constraints. My dad suddenly announced that the baskets would have to stay behind. We couldn’t bring them on the plane for whatever reason. The hotel maid would be the beneficiary of them. I think I was kind of ticked off about that, I hadn’t even gotten to nibble the ears off my big solid chocolate bunny yet. So that information having set in, we were whisked off to the airport to start a brand new life, in a brand new place. Which we did, as a unit on Easter Sunday, with our Easter Baskets left behind in a nice hotel room. Goodbye Bunny.

So now, as I reflect on this story I have to wonder if it was the cause of my unsettled feelings during the Spring season. Having been so young for it to have negative consequences while it was happening, maybe over time the actual impact of this Spring event did have an effect on me. It’s neither here nor there at this point. This is just me, trying to figure something out and maybe when I finally do, I’ll learn to embrace the Spring instead of fearing it. It was after all, just a big chocolate bunny I had to leave. The important thing, my family, was with me the whole way.

April 28, 2010

Coventry CT

  1. joannefirth says:

    Thank you Caroline. This was a tricky story to write as my memories of it are just bit and pieces. For some reason, those bits and pieces are always with me. My sister called after she read it to confirm that my memories were accurate and added her own to it. We both went back to that day together, which was amazing. I love your explaination, it makes so much sence to me now….decades later. ❤ ❤

  2. Caroline says:

    Great story Joanne! Definitely all the upheaval even if you were too young to “notice” it, the stress your parents were going through – just with the move, and the sadness of leaving family behind – I’m sure that all sunk into the 7 year olds mind, even if you couldn’t process it then. As we know – children are very intuitive, they feel our emotions even when we don’t express them verbally. I hope you do get to figure it out, so that you can embrace Spring – but either way I love being on your journey of “figuring stuff out” so thanks for sharing!! xxoo :o)

  3. joannefirth says:

    Awww Kristen, thank you. Sometimes I have a day that the past just jumps out and grabs me. I’m learning, slowly that if I try to capture it with words, the past goes back where it belongs. Thanks very much for your kind words. Love, love, love you too my dear friend. ❤

  4. joannefirth says:

    Dani, thanks so much for your continued loyalty and support. I know my writing is not very eloquent and I struggle with my lack of knowledge of proper punuation and grammar, but it’s the best I can do at this point. I appreciate you taking the time to stop by. Much love. ❤ ❤

  5. joannefirth says:

    Sis, thanks for reading and thanks for calling. You of all people know what I’m going after here. I know, some day, I’ll figure it out. Love you so much. ❤

  6. Kristen Heard says:

    Just now catching up on all your writings. you’ve been busy! you have such a talent. keep it up. keep sharing. i’ve learned more about you from these few stories than from all the twitterings of the past few months. what a heart you have. what a heart you have. love, love, love to you…..

  7. Dani H says:

    A major change in your life, Joanne, quite probably you’re right that your 7-year-old mind focused on the baskets. Very well written, bunny! Thank you so much for sharing. Love it! Love you! *big squishy hugs*

  8. Linda Adcock says:

    Ya know I was thinking about how you feel in the spring time and this exact story came into my mind and I wondered if leaving the baskets behind had anything to do with your not liking spring – it was just as traumatic for me and I was 14. We had gotten lots of extra candy that year because we were leaving and I remember not feeling very generous at all about leaving it behind. I think too it was something tangible to focus on instead of thinking about the things we really were leaving behind. Brilliant story sis – keep writing!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s